Interviewing is like dating – the reasons why
One can draw many parallels between their working lives and their personal lives. Have you ever heard of the term “work husband” or “work wife” (tbh I really hate those terms). Sometimes you might spend so much time at work that you feel like you’re in a relationship with it. Welp – do I have news for you: interviewing is a lot like a relationship too . . . interviewing is like dating! In fact, the two are so similar that you should actually feel empowered by this (hopefully this empowers you on a date as well). To be honest, I feel like the advice I am about to share could actually help in both your professional AND dating lives!
Firstly, I think we can all agree that settling for something that you don’t want it a BAD thing, in relationships or work. I understand that your first job out of university is needed to get your feet wet just as your first significant other in high school may not have been the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, but hey you have to start somewhere right? Mind you, there are those people that the rest of us envy who’s first love/career job is the absolute JACKPOT – and to you all – HOLD ON TO IT!
So if you didn’t hit jackpot on your first job (love) then don’t worry, you’re in the same boat at 99.99% of people. Once you have some experience under your belt then you can seek new opportunities (try not to create too many innuendos here!). When you’re sitting in an interview, it is a lot like a first date: you both googled each other in advance, checked every social media channel thinkable, and are asking a million questions to see if the other is ‘the one’. So why is it that in a job interview many people end up leaving the interview thinking that they didn’t really feel the fit, end up getting an offer and taking it? I mean I guess I understand if it checks most of the other boxes on your list, but ultimately YOU should be interviewing the company as much as they’re interviewing you!
During a date, you don’t just sit there and let the other person drill you and when they say, “do you want to know anything about me” you think. . .well I am not supposed to ask about vacation time, benefits or salary sooooo . . .“nope, I think I am good!” and leave the room. I would imagine that you would ask what their favourite things are, what kind of food they like or . . . “how long have you been with the company and what is your highlight so far?” ( I sure hope you pick up which questions to ask your date and which to ask the interviewer haha). Or if you’re feeling REALLY daring, “what are some of the challenges here that I will need to dive right into?” That is the kicker and a super important question! You need to get as much information as you can! Obviously, don’t flip out a notepad and drill the interviewer (or your date for that matter) but do try and see if there is a fit. If there is a second round ask a few more in depth questions! Ultimately, if after meeting / interviewing a few times and they want to go for it but you are still not feeling it, do more research and make a choice. “No” is an acceptable answer, so don’t be afraid to say it, just be nice/professional about it.
I think many people feel that once they’re far into the interview process they need to say yes. DON’T! Saying yes to a role can and will change your life. If it is for the better then EXCELLENT, but if you’re not excited about it, chances are it isn’t the right role (date) for you. Its the same thought process as why go on a second date with someone if you feel all around indifferent about them or worse, didn’t like them in the first place? Cut your losses and move on.
All in all – just remember life gives you choices, hopefully you are saying YES or NO and not being lukewarm about it all!
Happy dating . . . err . . . interviewing 😉
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